A Beautiful Adventure

Adventure.

It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? Adventure. This one word holds so much promise. Excitement. Challenge. Anticipation. Wonder. It has you on the edge of your seat because you can’t wait to embark on something that is unknown, yet beautiful .

Adventure. I have been on a beautiful adventure for the past year and a half. With days filled with excitement, growth, challenges, love, and countless ADVENTURES.

As I was heading into work today, I was overwhelmed with appreciation and thankfulness for my… (you guessed it) boyfriend, Jordan.

Now, before you stop reading or click out of this webpage, I can assure you that this isn’t going to be a mushy and gushy post (well, maybe just a liiiiitle). But my hope and prayer is that if you are married, currently in a relationship, or single, you will be able to find value in my words. Not just about the characteristics of a good partner, but rather, instead, finding an understanding of your worth and paying attention to the thoughts, and/or who or what you allow to surround yourself with.

I am so, so thankful for the adventure I have been blessed with to journey on with Jordan. I  met Jordan in March of 2015 at a church life group (small group), and although I’d like to say that the sparks ignited and we knew that we were “the One” for each other, I can honestly say that I thought he was just another genuinely young, nice guy. He came up to me after our meeting and asked me about myself, and it was a nice conversation. That was that. No sparks. No fireworks. No buckling at the knees (sorry, babe 😉 ). Just a new friendship.

As I attended the group for the upcoming months, I began to get connected with Jordan, his brother Luke, and Luke’s girlfriend, Ally. Long story short, the 4 of us became instant friends who were passionate about Jesus, health, and living life to the fullest. As the months went by, and I began to learn more about Jordan’s character, I noticed that there was something different.

Before I go on, friends, I want to stress that relationships (in my opinion and experience) need to start somewhere. Conversations strike up and you get to know each other… as FRIENDS. Eek. The “friend zone.” This zone freaks so many people out, but trust me… it’s an important step when getting to know someone- especially someone you’re considering pursuing a relationship with.

The “friend zone” doesn’t have to be negative! Instead, let’s call it the “learning zone.” You will learn about their family, how they treat their family, who they spend their time with, their habits, their passions, their beliefs, their interests, their goals, etc. There is no pressure in the “learning zone,” just simply a friendship. Will you begin to wonder if this person could be a potential boyfriend/girlfriend? Sure. Will other people start to notice your friendship blossoming? Oh yeahhh. Will others start to plant seeds in your head about how you two would been “good together”? You bet! Will others put pressure on you? Of course! Do you have the power to ignore the peer pressure and take things one day at a time? Absolutely.

Months went by and Jordan and I began seeing quite a bit of each other– in church, at life group, in our team meetings. It got to a point where I saw him 4+ times a week and that was because we had a lot of the same interests and passions. He was different. Different than most guys those days were at the age of 21 (yes, he’s about 2 years younger than me, folks). He was (and is) mature, passionate, driven, confident (but not cocky), respectful, family oriented, fun, a Jesus-lover, and so much more.

Of course, the rumors started. The seeds were planted in my head that we would be a “cute couple,” people thought we were already dating, I had friends in other states asking me if we were together, people told me he treated me differently, and so on and so forth.

Theeeen the thoughts and questions started:

Do I like him?

Does he like me?

I can’t tell!

Noooo. He’s too amazing, he wouldn’t be into me.

He’s not showing any signs!

He’s so respectful, so maybe he’s just being nice.

Why hasn’t he said anything to me or hinted at anything?

Why does everyone else talk to me about it? Everyone, except HIM!

 

Soooo, one day I finally mustered up the courage to have the “define the relationship” conversation after one of our meetings. And lo and behold… we were both feeling the same thing. 😀

Oh. Em. Gee! We liked each other! EEEEEEEPPPP! I was excited. I was nervous. I was thankful. Excited, nervous and thankful for the adventure ahead. 🙂

And then just like that. Life threw me a curve ball.

Not 24 hours later, life completely changed for me. God called my daddy home to join His kingdom on October 13, 2015.

Suddenly, that excitement turned to confusion. My confusion turned into worry. My worry turned into… I don’t even know. All I knew was that I was devastated.

I didn’t want to be that girl who exploded all over the guy who would potentially be my boyfriend. But now that this happened, I can’t even think about this relationship. I can’t leave my family in this time. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. He probably won’t want to deal with the potential emotional rollercoaster ahead of me.

Can’t. Don’t. Won’t. Didn’t      ALL negative.

Although it may have been true- I needed to focus on my family, I didn’t know what I was doing, and he had no idea what was to come with this journey… He didn’t leave. He stayed. Not in an intrusive kind of way, but in just the way I needed him. All he did was assure me that he was always available to me if and when I needed him.

Long story short (and not getting into too many details about my grief journey– stay tuned for a future post about this), our friendship blossomed into a beautiful relationship.

Ladies, find a man that will stick by your side when life gets messy, when the unexpected happens, and when situations aren’t ideal. A man who will be present, listen to you at any hour of the night, hold you when you cry, speak when words are necessary and stay quiet when they’re not. Ladies, find a man that you can trust, can confide in, laugh with, dream with, seek God with, and grow with every day.

I am thankful. So, incredibly thankful for the people God placed in my life. Some friends are in your life for years, for a season, or for forever. All clichés aside, I know that Jordan Paul will be one that will be in my life forever.

I could go on and on, as some of you already think I have, but you deserve the world. You really do. I stayed single for almost 6 years and I was patient… not allll of the time, but I trusted and I waited. I trusted that God knew what he was up to when he allowed me to find myself, my passion and my career. He allowed me to live an abundant life, and then when things were already beautiful, he brought someone unexpected into my life that made it that much more amazing. A beautiful adventure.

 

Friends, I want to ask you something. How many of you have longed for a meaningful relationship? Longed to have someone to trust in, confide in, talk to, grow with? Longed to have all of these things again in your current relationship or marriage? Longed for a beautiful adventure that doesn’t end?

If you said ‘yes’ to any of these then ask yourself this question- “Do I hold all of the qualities that I am looking for in another person?” Or phrased in the way I’ve heard it quoted many times before, “Are you becoming [or striving to become again] the person you’re looking for is looking for?” [If you want to know more about this topic- I’d highly suggest picking up a copy of Ryan Leak’s “The One.”]

Adventure. It’s full of excitement, challenge, anticipation, wonder, and ultimately- growth. Are you ready to seek a new adventure each day? The Lord didn’t allow me to wake up this morning and just “live another day” on earth. He allowed me to wake up with purpose. He allowed me to wake up to new opportunities, choices, and obstacles. He allowed me to wake up and take steps to become a better version of myself. He allowed me to wake up with thanksgiving for the people in my life. He allowed me to live a life of JOY. He allows me to have a beautiful and new adventure every single day.

It all begins with a choice. Let’s choose to see God’s many blessings each day. Let’s choose to look at life’s obstacles as lessons and opportunities for growth. Let’s choose to stop complaining about someone else’s short-comings and begin speaking life. Let’s choose to strive for a better version of yourself. Let’s choose JOY. [JOY- Jesus-Others-Yourself]

Do you see it? Slow down. Notice the things, opportunities, and people around you, and thank God for those blessing each and every step of the way.

How will you let God help you define your adventure?

 

❤ Melissa Joy

xo

“But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place.”

~2 Corinthians 2:14

“Consider is a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.”

~James 1:2-4